Hi baby girl! Were you up late again tonight watching the phillies? I bet you were. I know you are helping them win because they keep saying it is Red October and I know you would love that!
Ashley and I held your picture from school tonight. She gave you a kiss and so did I. She misses you but she is doing a lot of talking about you so I think that helps her. Mommy cried a lot Thursday and Friday but Ashley was with Daddy most of the time. Sometimes I am surprised by how much my heart actually hurts. Thanks for giving me the strength to do better the last two days.
We got pumpkins on Saturday! Ashley and I carved a silly face on your pumpkin cause we knew that is what you would like best. Ash made a happy face on hers and that certainly made me happy! We also painted a small pumpkin for you, there was a rainbow, a heart, your name, and a handprint from Ash.
Keep helping us be strong sweetie, and help us to remember all the good times. Please don't let me forget anything! I am going to go watch your video again, I love the sound of your sweet little voice. I wish I could feel your hand on my face one last time.
Goodnight baby girl.
P.S. I am going to add some photos of Ash doing her pumpkins. Art therapy is a wonderful thing!
Yet another sleepless night Ally! Oh well by now I'm pretty much used to the lack of sleep. Thank you for taking care of Ashley this week. She seems so much happier now that she is back at school. She has also been asking a lot of questions and talking about how she feels so I know that helps. I know her questions help her to feel better but they make me so sad. She misses you and she feels like she is the only child without a sibling. Please keep helping mommy and daddy to take care of her the best we can.
Tomorrow Daddy and I are going to take her to get pumpkins. She asked if she can get you one, of course she can. I think she is going to paint it instead of carving it. She knows how you hated the texture of the inside of the pumpkin!
I was so upset with myself today, I know you wouldn't want me to sit around and be sad but it bothers me that I am able to function with life so normally. Maybe it is because I am so used to functioning in crisis mode but I think it is because I am numb and haven't allowed myself to feel the full impact of you being gone forever.
Last night I fell asleep watching your video, I love to hear your voice. I showed Daddy how to save your voice on his phone, now your his ringtone! It's so sweet. Of course I wish I had recorded more of your voice.
I love you baby girl!
To everyone else, I am not sure if Shane or I have thanked everyone for all of your love prayers and support over the last week or so. We truly would not have made it through the week had it not been for all of the out pouring of sympathy. So whether you sent food or cards, said a prayer, gave a call, sent an email, made a donation to the Angel Ally Memorial Fund, or came to the services; THANK YOU!
I am going to try to get started on Thank you cards this week. If I miss anyone please don't be offended we appreciated everything everyone has done for us. Unfortunately I am not the most organized person so I have numerous thank you lists in numerous places so I am bound to miss someone.
Thank you again.
P.S. Speaking of the video I was talking about earlier here is the link to watch it!
I will also add the link to the homepage where we have other links listed.
Thank You Zach Reinert @ WZAR internet TV for making this awesome video and for such a wonderful tribute to our Angel Ally!
I woke up this morning, and something told me to turn on my cell phone. I did. You know how daddy doesn't like talking on the phone. It felt as if you were guiding my hands and fingers, I was led to an old saved text message with audio. The message was from August. When I clicked it I heard something I needed to hear! It was you! You said "Daddy I love You!" Ally I can't tell you how many times I have listened to it already!!! I really need to figure out how to save it and never lose that sound of your voice. Thank you Ally for guiding me to that message, it was buried in 300 old messages!!!
I feel so comforted knowing you are here with us, taking care of Ashley, Mommy, and Daddy! Please Ally continue to send me signs that you are ok, daddy really misses you!
We hope you loved your balloons Ally. You should count them, it's good practice! Ashley had a lot of questions tonight when we put her to bed. She wanted to know if you were going to watch over her while she slept. She asked if you were nocturnal!!! Don't ask me where she came up with that! I told her you would stay up if that's what she wanted you to do. She said you would need lots of energy to play in the clouds tomorrow so you better go to sleep too!
So sweet dreams! We miss you, we love you baby girl.
Hi sweetie, the last couple of days have been long and very busy. Its good though it has kept your Daddy and I busy. I'm worried about tomorrow well technically today but I am still hoping to get some sleep. It will be nice to see everyone and for them to pay tribute to you but I know it will be difficult.
I got some special red things to wear. I know you will like them especially my shoes. Ashley and Daddy got some red things too. Be sure to let Ashley know how beautiful she looks. She misses you so much. She told me tonight that four years old is too young to go to heaven. It's breaking my heart to watch her please help Daddy and I take care of her and help guide us to do what is best for her.
I have to go now sweetie, I know I should try to get some sleep. I lay your blankies next to me when I sleep but, I guess you know that. They smell like you...I miss you. I love you baby girl!
Good morning baby girl! I know its early but mommy can't sleep. I miss you. I think today will be especially hard because today is the first day that I won't get to see you, to touch you, to hold you, to smell you.
When I sat with you in my arms yesterday and today I felt like maybe I would be okay but now I sit and the pain in my heart is so strong. I don't understand how anyone can survive this pain. I know people do and I know I have to because of Ashley but I just don't know how. Please help Daddy and I to take care of Ashley she needs us all so much.
I miss you. I pray tonight, if I sleep, you will visit me in my dreams. Make sure you touch me so I can feel your wonderful soft hands. Call me Momma like you always did so that I can hear your precious voice. Don't leave me Ally, I never want to forget any part of you and I am so afraid I will. Let me know you are here with us. I know you are in a better place, no pain, no tubes, no hospitals, but I am selfish and I want you here.
I love you....I miss you.
I know you have all been waiting to find out when services will be held for Ally and I will get to that in a minute. First, Shane and I want to thank everyone for all the support, prayers, and sympathy that you all have offered to us and our entire family. A special thanks for the prayers for Ashley. She really is our biggest concern and we are trying our best to help her but are struggling so much ourselves.
Second, we just want to thank everyone in the ICU at duPont for all their tremendous work in caring for Ally. I basically watched every minute of the care they provided for her the other night, but her little body just wanted to rest. Also thank you to all the wonderful staff who cared for Ashley, Shane and myself. Thank you for the stories you shared and the condolences that you offered.
Third we want to thank our parents. They started this journey with us five years ago when we first learned that Ally would be born with complications. They have held us up, they like Ally and Ashley, have been our rocks. Without them we truly would not have been able to make it through these last few years. We know their hearts are as broken as ours and we wish we could ease their pain.
I also know that there are a million other people to thank and a million phone calls and emails to return but there just doesn't seem to be enough time. Also thank you to everyone who has dropped off or prepared food. It has been delicious and a huge help unfortunately, at this time we are out of fridge and freezer space! So for right now please just send prayers, that is what we need most.
As for the services, we want everyone to know that you are welcome to attend. We know that Ally has touched many peoples lives and we want everyone to be able to come and honor her memory.
We will be accepting visitors on Friday October 17th from 4p.m. to 8p.m. in the Chapel at St. John 's Lutheran Church. Located at 45 North Reading Avenue Boyertown, Pa 19512.
A memorial service will also be held at St. John's Lutheran Church, in the Sanctuary. On Saturday, October 18th at 10:30a.m.
We are planning to have some type of luncheon after the service on Saturday but have not finalized any details. We will post more info on this at a later time.
In lieu of flowers we ask the contributions be made to the "Angel Ally Memorial Fund" National Penn Bank P.O. Box 547 Boyertown, Pa 19512
For those of you that may not know this, Ally loved the color red! We are asking that if you have anything red to wear please feel free to wear it to the services. Also if you were a member of Ally's Angels and would like to wear your t-shirt we know Ally would love to see people there in her shirt. Every time she would see us wearing her shirt she would say "you wearing my shirt?"
Again thank you for all of your support. If you have any additional questions please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org Shane added a bunch of new pictures today so make sure you check them all out!
Oh Ally!!! I woke up this morning early and walked into your room hoping yesterday was just an awful dream. Not to see you lying there has left me so empty.
Daddy misses you so much, and you only been gone one day. I wished so many times I could take your place and pain away, but today I really want too switch places!
We had so much fun these past few weeks, and you were so happy the other day. Why couldn't I see that you were not feeling so well?
We were supposed to go to Disney today to finally have your wish granted, and you left without us. Why, why couldn't you wait! I don't know how I am going to go on without caring for you. That is all mommy and daddy know how to do, is care for you.
My heart just breaks when I look around this house and all the toys you left sitting out. Your room, your cloths, the smell of you, how do I let that all go?
I swear I'm living a nightmare, I just want to wake up... no parent should ever be faced with losing their child. No parent should have to endure so much pain and heartache!
Ally, I want to be positive and strong for you and Ashley, but Daddy is so tired of being that person. I know the right things to do are to continue to help all those other sick children who need us and your Angel's presence, but how do I get that strength back?
Ally I know your home, and I hope you will wait for me to get there. Daddy misses you so much this morning, and love you, Ashley and Mommy with every bit of my heart!
As many of you or may have heard, today our little girl was called upon to take her trip with Jesus. You can't even begin to imagine what it's like to have put so much into raising a child like Ally, only without warning to have her taken from you. She was so happy yesterday and this weekend.
I'm not even sure what to say in this update, for the first time I am lost for words. Not too mention writing while crying never really works well.
Ally passed away this morning at 5:59 a.m. The staff at duPont hospital did everything they could to save her. It seems it may have been an infection, and her little heart couldn't go no more.
Jill was there to be with her, and just like Ally coming into this world, (which I missed) I also missed saying goodbye! Some father huh?
I can't write anymore, my headache is too much to bare. We will update soon with funeral services. Most likely they will be this Saturday.
Thank you for all the prayers and well wishes! Without such great support, we would have never had these past 4 great years as we did with Ally.
Please pray extra hard for Ashley, our poor girl has been through so much!!!!