Ally Heintz » Recent Journal Entries » AboutMyBaby - online baby scrapbooks, photo albums, videos, birth and pregnancy announcements

Fri, Jun 26, 2009

Fri, Jun 26, 2009 7:10 PM
Well Ally, it's been a long time since daddy wrote you a message. You being gone will never become easier.

I worry so much about your sis, and all that she is currently going through. Ash told me yesterday how unfair it was that she had to lose you, and also have a family that was divorced. She told me how lucky I was not to have to deal with that! When she says things to me like that, I have such a hard time holding back my tears. My reply to her was that she was right it is unfair, I didn't face that loss as a child, but I told Ash I was facing it right now also with her. I didn't ask for any of this pain. Ally help ease your sisters worries.

Ally the road I have traveled these last 9 months has allowed me to meet some extraordinary people. Each person has touched me in a way that has made me see myself and what I have left to offer as being something very special! I know now, that taking the time to rediscover myself and Ashley is what is going to make my life wonderful again! This time alone is allowing me to make smart decisions about life, and also continue to build my vision of keeping your life (Ally) alive!

Ally, I took my first huge step the other week at keeping your life and legacy alive, by reaching out to the GIft of Life organization. Meeting with them last week was such an incredible experience. Ally I want you to know that I will never allow your story nor your smile to die!! I want you to be proud of your daddy when that day comes, and we finally hug and you give me one of those big smooches!

During my meeting with the Gift of Life, we talked about you, Ashley, Mommy, and me. We discussed lots of ideas of how we could help others and how Ally you could help the Gift of Life raise the 2 million needed to build the new family house in Philadelphia! Yes, Al's, that's allot of money! Something tells me we can help. So ideas' are already being laid on the table, some very exciting ones!!!!

Ally thank you for watching over daddy these last few days. Having a father's day without you was tough. The day before though I enjoyed your signs to make me smile!

The first sign from you was when I was at the auction digging through a bunch of old stuff. When I reached down and pulled up a very old 1950's pin. When I turned it over, I couldn't believe what I saw! The old worn out pin read "Angel Ally"!!!! I rubbed it like 20 times to make sure what I was seeing was real! It was!

Your second sign was just as great. Saturday night before I went to bed, I was feeling a little sad. I took out a bunch on crumbled up $1 bills from my pocket to straighten them out. As I got to the last dollar, across it in big "RED" letters read, "Smile Jesus Loves You"! Of course I smiled and cried, cause I knew you did that!

Finally your third sign came the day after Father's Day. When I got to work, as I looked out the window, there on the grass was a bunch of red heart balloons! They were worn a tattered, almost as if they had flew thousands, and thousands of miles just to land at our window. They looked like the same balloons your sister flew to you the day of your funeral. All I could was stand there and stare at them, I couldn't believe my eyes!!!

Thank you Ally for watching out for daddy! I miss and love you baby girl!!!

Daddy

Comments:
Carol Graves: Jill, Shane and Ashley,
I wanted you to know you are all in my prayers. I think of you often and keep Ally's picture above my desk. She will remind me of "hope".
Stay well.

martha: Hi Shane- Thanks for the amazing update!! I know Ally is with you all-please know your family and friends are here for you.

I'm excited to hear more about your "ideas" for GOL! We will catch-up soon!

Martha

Carol Yeager: I was so glad to receive your update and I hope that your days ahead will continue with faith and also the beautiful memories that you have of Ally. I do believe that she is allways looking down on you and sending as much beautiful memories as possible. I know the love that children bring to a family and also I couldnt imagine a home without children allthough my daughter is an adult now and lives far away in Hawaii,but that doesnt make it easy for any mother or father , we miss her alot .She doesnt call very often nor do we get to chat online too often either.I wish you and your family all the good things that the Lord will offer you and allways remember there are eyes in the sky .

Nicki: Hi Shane,
I think you were right behind us at the Reading Phills the other night. I was going to introduce myself, but didn't get the oppotunity since we weren't in the seats much...our 1 & 3 yr old would rather walk around :) I think it's awesome you are all going to continue your work with Gift of Life. I want to thank you for helping me see the other side of donation...I used to think I didn't want to reach out to Collin's other recipients in case they weren't doing well or have moved on to Heaven...but now I realize no matter how long or short their time after their tranplant....every extra day was a gift for their family. We are meeting one of Collin's recipients today - a little girl who received his intestine. Hopefully one day we'll be able to meet the others, but I am at least inspired to reach out to them again thanks to Ally. She is such an inspiration. I hope she and Collin have met in Heaven.
Take care & God Bless.

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